These 5 points will tell you that you are overprotecting your child

We only want the best for our little ones – of course! We would prefer to keep our children away from all the evil in the world, but too much care is not always good for children, they also need to have their own experiences. But that’s easier said than done! These 5 Signs You Might Be Too Cautious

#1 You are always afraid of your child

When your child is ready to let go of your hand on the playground and charge up on their own, let them go. Children have a natural thirst for knowledge – give this childlike curiosity room to develop! This is sometimes very difficult because there are dangers lurking everywhere: the child could get hurt, someone could offend and disturb them, they could… Stop! From the fight over the swing on the playground to the first apartment during the study period – your son or daughter must have these experiences, even negative ones.

Tip: Let your child try things on

You cannot and should not exempt him from all conflicts and difficulties because your child only learns and develops by trying things out (including failure). It has been proven that very anxious parents have anxious children: if the child has experienced throughout his life that his mother was always afraid of him, he later has less confidence in himself. Therefore, even if it is difficult, let your child experience it. If it falls, it rises again – and there you are.

#2 You always see your child as the poor victim

Imagine your child has lost a singing competition and is crying bitterly because of their loss. “I’m so sorry, my poor darling! You’re so much better than this competition, you’ll never have to enter it again!” can express your sympathy and comfort a child in tears at the moment. But disappointment, frustration and sadness are part of life and make the joy of victory possible in the first place. If you want to protect your child from all the disappointments in this world, deprive you also give him the opportunity to surpass himself and achieve the unbelievable.If it wins the singing competition one day, it will make up for all the tears.

Tip: Allow bad experiences too

Children need such experiences to cope with the demands of life. Instead of saving your child from disappointment, encourage them to keep trying and turn disappointment into motivation!
Although it breaks our hearts as parents to see our child in such despair, the child gains character strength: He learns that he must do something for his success and learns to value it.

Disappointments and setbacks are a part of life.

#3 You avoid difficult subjects

It is not easy to talk to children about topics such as online dangers, violence or even death, but it is absolutely necessary. Creating awareness of the disadvantages in life is the first step in preventing them. Knowledge is power applies here again: A well-informed child doesn’t just get into a stranger’s car because they know about the danger.

Tip: Talk openly with your child

It is far better to experience difficult, bad or sad problems in the protected and safe environment of your parents than through the media, at school or in a similar situation. Give your son or daughter the opportunity to ask questions and always add helpful and child-friendly explanations. These conversations are for clarification. Books are also useful for getting started with difficult subjects, e.g. B. about the separation of the parents, the death of a loved one, etc.

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#4 You are overprotective of your shy child

It is unbearable for a mother to see the difficulties her child has in making friends. All children play at the birthday party, but yours stands still and seems to hide in itself? Some children have difficulty socializing. That’s perfectly fine, everyone is different. But developing social skills is necessary and also useful.

Tip: Help your child carefully

Let your child try (possibly with a little help) to create new connections and get involved in each other’s games. Encourage them, even if they say they don’t want to play with the other children. Here it is important to find the balance, to respect the child in his or her way and at the same time open up new opportunities for him and support him not to let his shyness hold him back. Phrases like “Don’t be so shy!” has no place here, because it inhibits your daughter or son even more. Make him or her feel that everything is fine and wonderful just the way it is. Don’t shield your child from challenges, but encourage and support them. Praise your child and collect experiences together where courage has paid off.

#5 You always solve your child’s problems

Your child gets a bad grade and your first impulse is to ask the teacher for an appointment? Of course, there are many situations where such a conversation makes sense, but it is a matter of reflection: Am I instinctively trying to free my child from all the problems? First and foremost, the child is responsible for his own grades – and you should strengthen your child in that! Children who have never experienced problems themselves find it all the more difficult as adults, especially when they themselves one day slip into the role of mother or father.

Tip: Think about possible solutions together with your child

In the end, problems at school do not have to rule out the agreement with the teacher, but first make you aware: you take your child for advice and give him the tools for his life. Give him your experience and wisdom along the way, give him advice, find solutions to a problematic situation or come up with good phrases to confront the bad boy from the parallel class. If your offspring has a fight with a friend, let him settle the differences himself, because after a fight is resolved, the friendship is all the stronger. If your child asks you for advice, don’t get involved right away, but work with them to find strategies to solve the problem. But let it go yourself, your child can handle it! And at some point it becomes a mentor and role model for its own children.

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